This new gig of mine

I'm going on two months of being at home with the kids. I have many mental lists of things I hope to accomplish from housecleaning, to crafts, to things to do with the kids. I thought I would have checked a lot more of those tasks off the lists by now, but I find that just being at home with the kids is a job in itself. I have done some pretty important things though. I watched Owen progress from rolling, to sitting, to scooting, to pulling up, to cruising. I helped him learn to kiss and watched him discover how to make his hand wave. I've tickled, giggled, rocked, soothed and played with him. I've taught Caleb and Emily how to play some of my favorite board games, read with them, cooked with them and colored with them. I've watched Caleb figure out multiplication all on his own, and seen some spectacular Emily fashion shows.

I completely appreciate how lucky I am to have this opportunity. To spend your days watching your children grow up is a gift that many don't get. So I've decided the most important thing on my list is now "Enjoy my children". And I'm loving every minute of that task.

I still have no idea what the future holds for us. I've always had something to work towards, whether it be finish school, or get a better job. There has always been a goal, something beyond me, Eric and the kids and our daily grind. I'm having a hard time wrapping my head around just being their Mom and running this house. I try to comfort myself by figuring out a plan but everything is so uncertain. My biggest hang up is that I'm not providing financially for the family. But there are more ways to provide for a family than financially. I have an amazing husband who actually enjoys his job, so why not let him take care of that part for now? I am so thankful for him and his support. I think he's more supportive of me staying home than I am myself, and I love him for that.

So a new chapter of my life has begun. Operation BonBon.